THERE ARE basics that must adhered to when escaping from ones seaside bolt hole, so reversing the old soft E-Type Jaguar up the steps of the Grand Hotel, before hurling my luggage out of the window, along with several bottles of Cristal champagne, some of which bounced out onto the street, I hate waste.
This sort of exit from any scene pricks the attention of the authority’s and should be advised against, but by now I had already covered myself in beer and sun tan oil and set off a box of fireworks and weapons grade Thunder Flashes, while standing naked all but a Penfield Bake Camo hat at my room window, so was really beyond caring.
I had packed all my belongings into some overtly stylish bags; well you cannot travel badly can you.
I initially hurled out one of the best of my mini-collection the English made Brady bags’ Sand Marlborough.
This weekend/travel bag, with zipped main compartment, plus leather shoulder strap is made of waterproofed canvas and solid brass fittings; you may call it the daddy.
I find I carry a lot of my papers, plans, acid blotters and gun shells in my uber classy Windsor khaki bag. I am loving the leather dispatch style bag in full leather, it has a mobile phone inner pocket and is well too nice to be hurling out of the third floor window of a hotel.
I am sucker for a bit of tradition and the Penfield Irondale Navy roll bag reminds me of the good old days on ‘Whore leave’ with the lads in Peng Tang, during my days advising the US Navy on tactical issue.
Bunking down with Steve McQueen, you may know him . The superb gym style bags look stylish and are practical with leather covered nylon handle and adjustable shoulder strap.
The Herschel Supply Co range of bags are superb as well, I plumped for the WSH Rugsack, the fully lined canvas bag comes in a superb stone blue, with leather straps.
Sergei’s porn laden laptop was slipped snugly into a blue Unit Portables Bag, the 01 laptop bag. Complete with shoulder strap and hand carrier. The bag has a bit of origami about it and folds up to make a fashionable shoulder bag, along with pockets for phone, wallet and charger.
It comes in red or blue and one again it is not advised to throw this bag, complete with laptop out of a fourth floor window onto the tarmac below. Oh well Sergei won’t be using it again will he.
Screeching away from the destroyed entry steps the Jag is one hell of a motor, Fangio used to drive it when he acted as mother’s chauffer, Esplendido blazing away I felt a frisson of excitement as two mountain bike riding police officers leapt out into the road beside the old Jag.
Bond style usage of a flying champagne cork, put end to that and also enabled me to quaff a parting tipple as signs for Eastbourne came into view. The old blue rinse side of town could be the perfect place to hide out until The Colonel launches his rescue mission. He was citing something called Sky Hook?
I’ll drink to that.