ALONG WITH the crashing of the waves, I can hear the bashing of law books as my team of highly paid QCs take up their robes on defence of the realm, namely yours truly Skylon.
In the interim during my ingenious break form the clutches of Her Majesty’s (Gord bless her) Prison Service, I have managed to acquire a one-time Eastern Block Olympic wrestler and KGB operative Sergei, who by the looks of it could take several rounds to his formidably square head without flinching, hence helping me avoid falling foul of the law, should I have a repeat blunderbuss incident, a la Horace, for those of you who read my previous communiqué.
Having managed to fire up the old Bristol, Sergei and I, made haste to the coast, and I am now plotted up on Brighton beach, staring at the sea, and wondering about the truth behind the origins of the fleur de lis being awarded to an old Puncenello, living on the very beach I now find myself.
Anyway, I digress, my head filled with all variants of madness following a night of revelry follow my escape, which saw several bottles of the old widow imbibed, while chatting to my old chum and your one time correspondent The Colonel on a satellite phone from Cuba.
The old sea dog was planning a daring nightime helicopter break out for his old chum Skylon, complete with Che Guevara facial hair and commando greens, along with a plethora of high explosives.
The Colonel is not a man to do things by halves.
Anyway, Sergei, as you might expect, is an expert in disguises and knowing my love of quality fashion he has been checking out some bits and bobs to help me remain hidden from the long arm of the law.
The most obvious starting point for me was sunglasses and what better place to start than Rayban?
The archetypal cult sunny comes in the shape of the Aviator, everybody bows down to this don of shades, the entry level pair comes in the guise of the large metal Aviator, the 100 per cent UV lenses come as standard, the iconic shaped lens and frame, which has been tugging at the heart strings since the 60s, with a gun metal frame colour, with shaded lens.
Next up the rankings comes the Ultra, which is a limited edition version of this icon, with 18k gold-plated engraved titanium frame and with ‘hydro-oleophobic’ coating on the lenses, what a word that is, I am sure I’ve smoked some of that once while in India with Ravi Shankar and George Harrison.
These come in Gold and White gold frames or try the the Gun mirrored, which smacks of ‘The Man with No Eyes’ in Cool Hand Luke’, which seems appropriate in my current situation on the wring side of the law.
The Cockpit shade comes in various guises; the Metal, which is less oval shaped Polarised lens, coming in green, or in Gold with again green lens or the Silver.
I have been sporting the RB blue shades, which are part of a new range and have gradient brown lenses, a blue plastic frame, with a real 1960s cross style shape. They are also available in black, with black lenses, similar in shape to the Caravan shade.
Of course the Wayfarer lens is another beauty, or drop in the Outdoorsman, which of course has the trim leather detailing.
Sporting some of the summers best looking casual threads in the Orlebar, I have a particular hankering for the Felix polos, coming in Mazanine, with a nice buttonless front placket, it also comes in Riva. If Terry Toweling is your thing, and it is definitely mine, then the stunning polo is something truly special, in a similar style and cut as the Felix, but in TT. Coming in three colours, lagoon (green), Navy and Riva (red).
In a similar laidback style Munsingwear, Penguin are still rocking it, as you would expect, the Floral Total is a delicious addition to the Heritage line, with a stunning floral print.
Or the Lab Rat Geo Jacquard Front polo which ouzes class and just highlights how this label is blazing a trail.
The styles my new right hand man has selected seem apt, sat hear typing as I am on the beach, supping large glasses of Mount Gay, packed with ice.
It really is the only way to clear the cloudy head champagne always leaves me with.
I’ll drink to that.