Wednesday, 5 June 2013

Anderson belts, not Hans Christian Anderson

HAS THE world gone completely mad? PC gone OTT I say. ‘To what madness do you refer Master Skylon?’ I hear you ask.

Well my recent incarceration at Her Majesty’s Pleasure for a mild incursion with my last butler Horace who was loading the buckshot into my favourite blunderbuss and I some how managed to fall onto the trigger whilst reenacting the Charge of the Light Brigade to a few lords and nobles after having imbibed some hi-grade LSD.

I could barely see the bloody gun, or man servant, so how the hell could I possibly be responsible for the removal of Horace’s head, but that’ the law for you these days.

Anyway, having been held in HMP Parkhurst, I declined all prison attire and began organising an ingenious way to escape from my bary hole, which was achieved quite simple by the superb Anderson belts.

I had of course well packed Brady’s bag of fine clothing, which included four said Italian masterpieces starting with the True suede grey woven belt, I love this little Parma handmade fella, its textile, suede combination with solid brass buckle in a grey finish. The True belts come in beige and navy.

I also slipped in another class leather belt in plain brown, 100 per cent leather and is squared off and is really bloody nice.

I linked the two together, along with a leather belt with rounded buckle, polished leather which is one inch wide, then linked it up with a textile multicolour belt.
The last belt is the M6 and is a total winner with leather trim, elasticated stretch to fit belt, contrast stitch and of course brass buckle.

So I am wondering if you are with me on my route to freedom? I had a fair length of superbly handcrafted belts, I went out in the ‘Yard’ as I believe the other prisoners call it, swang those leather and textile beauties skyward hooking the top of the fence, climbed up and out over the top and off to freedom and a large rhesus negative and some oysters at Kettners, London.

Fanciful yes, but I am sure you do not question a man of my calibre do you? Well how else do you think I could return to entertaining the troops with my fabulous blogs?

It's good to be home in Skylon Towers and familiar surroundings, cheers, I'll drink to that.